FUN9

I was wondering if I in the future have a lot of money, enough for a giant bussiness, why I am not advocating or maybe creating and constructing my own holiday site like the waterbooms, as simple as they were exist, with restaurants and traditional meals side indisde!

I can put a lot more of giant thrilling slides and another simple thrilling means. And I will have that place named FUN9. It's not be read Fung/funk, but already Fun-Nine. Because I used to play The Sims and there's a major level that shows how much some stuff fulfilling the Sims needs in daily life, such as 600 SimsDollar shower box, can only increase 6 hygenie level. So that the site I'd be created will increase 9 levels of fun o everyone who join and play, and pay! Hahaha.

Just my dream!
I mean...JUST my dream!

The Incredible Mornings

Puisi ini kutulis pertama kali di memo hape. Pas pagi2, aku dengerin lagu lama judulnya "If" yang dinyanyiin Susan Wong. Tau2 aku melihat2 keluar jendela karena lagunya lembut banget, di kejauhan adalah nampak dia, sambungan bangunan pabrik jagung orang cina, terbuat dari seng semua, baik dinding maupun atapnya, mungkin tempat untuk njemur2nya gitu, ya. Jadi, cahaya matahari yang masik kuning2 telor gitu menimpa dinding2 seng itu, aduh, jadi benar2 dramatis sekali. Warnanya kayak resolusi channel DAAI TV gt.

Inilah dia...

Searching for sunlight drops every morning, I was.

Each time, I was finding another illussion to another place.

I was sitting, merely to find answer

why I was sobbing over all they gave to me

And what if God is punishing me for my past life's sins..?

I don't understand how people seeing life so different

And why I have to confess, while there's no one there to see and listen to.

Maybe it's just the way I live,

I must be grateful that I realized what I found and experienced,

is just how much I did.
And when people is crying,I know that I just get to do what I can do...

Sorcerer's Lousy Magazines (Part II)

Telah lama sebenarnya tercetus ide ini, maka ahirnya mamakku yang telah sulit mbaca tulisan kecik2 menyewakan komik-komikku yang uda lama2, termasuk komik X-Men yang baru kubelik bekas itu, gopek 1 dibikinnya, boleh dibawa pulang. Lares jugak, kan anak2 lagi liburan skola. CUman anak2 prempuan yang uda2 agak gedek tu mintak nopel2 teenlit, yang mana tak mungkin rasanya kujamah, secara teenlit2 tu kan marak2nya pas aku da tua bangka juga, mau2 tamat sma. lagian crita2nya gak nyambung ke otakku yang sibuk dengan tema-tema laen, jadi ya kurang tertarik aku, walopun sbnrnya enak jugak skali2, perna nengok punya kawan...

Sorcerer's Lousy Magazines (Part I)

Kmren2 tu borong dari hasil kerak-kerak dompet yang hanya tinggal 16ribu perak (maklum, 'orang' miskin) dapet 2 Newsweek (special report tragedi kecelakaan JFK, Jr tahun 1999, sama edisi "Voices of The Fallen" ttg prajurit2 yg gugur di perang Iraq 2007 [ah, mampos situ pikerku pertama2nya, tapi agak2 horor juga isi surat2 prajurit2 itu untuk keluarga mereka...), 1 National Geographic tahun '97 yang judol gedeknya "Siberian Tigers" (Rp 10.000), sama 1 komik X-Men (bahasa Indonesia) #9 Back To Weapon X. Asiknyaaaku pas itu, namanya orang kampong arak nggoyo iso ngomong inggres. Tak baca kuat2 di kamar sampe' dilece2 bcanda sama bapakku, yang keluar-masuk kede-dapur untok nyeduh kopimik.
Lumayanlah hasil buruanku. Buat ditengok2 sambil menggali inspirasi di waktu senggang. Weleh...

Cannot Change That I'm An Ugly Person And Personality As well As People See

Ye olde story is that I was going always on this same lousy way. Because it's scary to be a Mental body, while person sees as far as Physic and Astral only. Feeling alone and unreached, to be helpless and anger, jealousy, sputtering over on the way I was running this whole ridiculous and freaky life. And I'm still wishing that something is going turn away, and my life is rearranged to be wiser, brighter, and calmer, and happier. Even if I have to lost everyone and everything, and, to die, for the last sense of ability.

Linkin Park - Shadow of The Day Lyrics

Shadow of the Day

[Chester Bennington]

I close both locks below the window.
I close both blinds and turn away.
Sometimes solutions aren’t so simple.
Sometimes goodbye’s the only way.

And the sun will set for you,
The sun will set for you.
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.

Pink cards and flowers on your window,
Your friends all plead for you to stay.
Sometimes beginnings aren’t so simple.
Sometimes goodbye’s the only way.

And the sun will set for you,
The sun will set for you.
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.

And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.

[Guitar solo]

And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.

This is Not THE PLACE

This is not kind of the place to talk out this way, but I... feel sorry for myself and everything, everyone.

But I can’t stop joining someone’s life without escaping natural conversation to get more warned about what I see and feel about my life. And they will always becoming, seem, not interested, and uh…just like an accident on the street, sometimes I looked to find out whom is to blame because of my messed job, and who is ye more guilty before ye conversation became this head aching, and maybe sometimes harmful for the ones who tell me that they know me and I mustn’t feel like that, because they always seem to get the way out of here, that they are not actually never be in.

And then I looked up my newfound: That I am surrounded by ignorant people, starts from my parents, family, the closer friends,… but actually sounds, "So What?"

Because since what should happen is just like I do what I can do, and surely I hope I’ll be able to ignore all people thoughts and acts to me along ye life.

Before I hurt a lot of more…

My Story

It's very odd in time you are surrounded by people who says they know you even better. Everytime they always seem to have the right answers and explanations about you, to ignore all your suggestions or confession about your life, and what's happening in there. Seemingly there is no big deal about the whole things since we have ALL THESE LIVES to run out, and since we HAVE THAT CONNECTION with all over different people everyday. But, it is still more like painful the way I feel, and this extra-oddness has belonging over me of almost 20 years in time. Any question?

When will I die?

Thousand Times

Thousand times I had had to imagine giving explanation and confessions to people around me, who never might to come around and asking, "What is happening?" Just like the psychologists say, imagining doing something emotionally can help satisfy you emotionally. But it doesn't seem work for me. I thought I will, but no. I thought I will feel proposed. But it all seems to be just like another more spraging that used to fill along my ridiculous life.

AS IF Confession

It must be great to be some kind of artists, strong character of face and happy holly sexy hot body and look, but still good in romance, and low profile, and say hello to everyone without any perception, to be kind to another people of region and country, through the races and colors, and thought and way of life, and just have a lazy and melancholic life, and not to know that all I have were that much and happy to do every single trouble and mess I got to get.

Or maybe as simple as... be able to choose any of one you want to be and inserting one life you possibly can effort to join this your Life System, and earn a lot of goodness and do much think positive about everyone, everything...and...just have capability to be on different ways...of life...to cath every chances and luck...to have anything I want...to be more somebody else in the next time, and bidding another life to be experienced, and...just have to take a small pace into another, another some kind of life...'Till I don't know how much I like myself!!!

Arrgghhh!!

I must be a Satanic. I have wrong imaginations, and I don't want to. But it all seems more like a jealousy. I always would like to be somebody else. And it's very strongly romantic, sweet, comfortable, and save. And I always know that always better to be yourself is going to be. But then I will push over all those thoughts and I seem to be more still want to be somebody else.

But somehow I know by myself, that nothing is good. Nothing is smart, happy, funky, lovely, or gorgeous. Those really are phenomenon. Illusions, and short-lasting. But it doesn't make any sense of all. People stay in this world, this Life System, the great one life system, to be different and run different ways of life. And sometimes I was very jealousy for somebody else's life. It's low, lazy, but running slowly and sure like a catch upon a basket in a basketball game. Then after the ball is falling, you end the life and give some report in the front of Who Has Everything. Then you will be chosen, to be in good place, or worse place, to be timed out, or last forever, to be reincarnated, or to stay and watch. 'Till The Final Day is come.

I must be dangerously insane. And I don't want to hurt anybody just like I used to be. I have to find and give more chances just for myself, and it'll be hard, but...I always afraid of everything, so...why can't I effort these chances and begin to returning over? Even if in a hurt condition and shallow imaginations (oh, that last one I got to make over)..? I always think to and for and about myself. And I can only do that because I have a different life here, so, I have to make it just a good work and the result has to make me out of here forever, so I can live my life better and comfortably.

I wish best wishes for myself. All of Good Luck, dude. I always be inside you, and to keep you feel lonely but it's okay, feel afraid but it's alright, and grab hand on hand in every dangerous sessions of you life. Isn't it sound Okay..? I promise. We'll be home soon.